Secrets

From Criminal Minds:

"There are no secrets better kept, than the secrets that everybody guesses." George Bernard Shaw

This blog is my secret, told into cyberspace, to a universe without ears. I say a lot and leave a lot unsaid. I cry for help, for peace, to belong, to be heard, to have made a difference.

I am so cold. My fingers and feet are ice. I feel the cold reaching into the center of my soul, my heart is weary. I seem to do less and less and that is hard to imagine, given how little I do. I have lost interest in shows and find it hard to watch them fully. I miss parts and don't mind missing them. It hasn't even snowed yet and I am inside 24/7. Soon enough I will need to buy food, but I will need to get cleaned up first. The cold is in my face, and in my chest. It's 46 degrees in here and I know I could do things to make a bit warmer ... but I can't seem to care enough. I am tired.

I think about doing things .. I live them in my mind as though they were happening, but I have done nothing.

I imagine conversations or letters written .. to David Fotland, to Robert and Rosalind Fritz, to Ellen...

"If we knew each others secrets, what comforts we should find." John C Collins